Loving an Addict or Alcoholic: How to Help Them and Yourself
When people struggle with drug or alcohol abuse, they are likely to struggle with mental health issues and physical problems, both short-term and chronic.
They are also expected to cause suffering for their loved ones, including parents, spouses, children, friends, and added family.
For those who love someone struggling with alcohol or drug abuse, it is necessary to know the signs of substance abuse problems and how to help an addict. Besides, family members and friends must take care of themselves as well.
Drug or Alcohol Abuse Symptoms
Mayo Clinic offers a complete list of traits displayed by a person struggling with drug or alcohol abuse. Many of these may be personal experiences for that individual; nevertheless, signs that may be evident to others incorporate:
- Attending social events only if drugs or alcohol are available; becoming intoxicated before the social event, or attending fewer social events especially to drink or use drugs
- Developing problems with cognition and memory
- Lying about the substance or how much they are using
Being lethargic, sleeping more irregular hours, sleeping, or looking unwell or tired
- Appearing intoxicated more and more often
- Emerging problems at work or school; possibly losing one’s job or dropping out of school
- Stealing money or valuables to pay for drugs
- Becoming sad, angry, or lashing out when questioned about their substance abuse
- Undergoing withdrawal symptoms when they are unable to take the drug
- Overlooked appearance and poor hygiene
People who fight substance abuse issues are likely to behave differently when they are intoxicated versus when they are sober; they may say or do hurtful things. They are required to take dangerous risks with their life, such as driving while intoxicated. These behavioral difficulties can cause intense worry and fear in loved ones.
Control vs. Influence
Those who love a person fighting addiction may, at some point, try to use force when figuring out how to help an addict. Even if the person accepts, they may fail in their attempt to defeat the addiction. Addiction is not a choice that an individual can control; it is a compulsion, so they cannot stop consuming drugs or alcohol without help.
The risk/reward center of their brain has been rewired with repeated reinforcement of these cravings.
Blaming them or trying to protect them from outcomes is not how to help an addict; this is because neither the person nor their loved ones have control.
Loved ones do hold a great deal of influence in the life of a person struggling with drugs or alcohol. Gathering a group of loved ones together to stage an intervention – as long as it is thoroughly planned and focused on helping the addict – can be a way to show love and support while also setting boundaries around addictive behaviors. Indeed, just sitting the person down and talking to them about matters in a clear, calm, and concise way can influence. Regularly offering help in the form of social support, knowledge on drug rehabilitation programs, and other methods to get healthy and sober may prompt the person to receive help.
